We all know that Florida is home to the craziest stories on the intrawebs. South Florida may lead in the area with the craziest. Here is another one to laugh about, and it is right here near the Dive Bar. A home surveillance camera in Florida captured a man on video as he pulled into another person’s driveway and defecated on the ground, a report said Tuesday.
The ‘crappy person’ aka the suspect pulled into Wilton Thomas’ driveway in North Lauderdale. He dropped his trousers and relieved himself, the video shows.
The ‘illegal pooper’ then cleaned himself off with a shirt and left the feces and the soiled shirt right there at the scene.
“I know when it comes on for you to go, you have to go,” Thomas said, being way too understanding and nice. “He could have drove himself right toward the left in the fence toward the coconut tree and do what he wanted to do there. That would be no problem…but in my driveway?” he added.
“I went in the hot sun, scraped it up, poured it into a bag. I poured bleach, and then I hosed and washed the whole thing off,” Thomas said.
Thomas said he left the mess in the driveway until the next day because it was too late when he got home that night.
The Broward County Sheriff’s Office is investigating the incident, according to reports.
We here at The Dive Bar think that this story really stinks. We aren’t San Francisco, we are Fort Lauderdale. We shouldn’t accept pooping anywhere in our streets. The good news, is that there is no poop at The Dive Bar. All we have is great pub grub, karaoke all week, live bands all month long, lot’s of cool and happy people, great vibes, stiff cocktails, and the best staff this side of the Mississippi. We hope to see you down here ASAP. We will save a stool for you.